Weekly Photo Challenge: Celebration

I wasn’t thinking about textures, patterns, or framing when I took this picture maybe I wanted to tell a story with it. As I search for a photo to depict celebration I’ve chosen this one because of the symbolic meanings behind it. The cross that Jesus crucified on was constructed out of trees and the craved heart is the reason for it. It’s a celebration of love, death, and resurrection. It’s a celebration of eternal life pass down from generations to you and me!

I Know… I Don’t Know…

by Judi Chow

I can’t stand it when people think they have all the answers, particularly when I know that person doesn’t know anything regarding to the subject matter. Did you catch me? I just became that presumptuous person when I wrote, I know that person…! The revelation came during seminary graduation with a little panic, now I know I don’t know much about God, theology, the Bible, and myself for that matter! It was years later that I am thankful I have this awareness- that I don’t know. The next question is, do I really want to know, how much or how deep do I really want to know about God, life, and the future?

An old hymn came to mind– “I don’t know about tomorrow, I just live from day to day… Many things about tomorrow, I don’t seem to understand, but I know who holds tomorrow, and I know who holds my hand.” I have to admit there are many things I don’t understand and have no answers to. I won’t pretend a philosophical answer to “Why does God allow suffering?” will ease the pain of those sobbing or shouting, “Where is God when the building’s crashing down on my parents? Why didn’t God save my wife? How can I go on living while my only son is dead?”

Suffering is painful and separation is difficult no matter how you look at it. How can anyone endure the unbearable and have the strength to face tomorrow? I believe only love can dry the tears and restore hope. Don’t you remember John 3:16? “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son…” Because of love, God endured separation from His only son. Because of love, Jesus endured suffering for our sake. Because of love, we have hope of restoration. Buildings might crumble, lives would change, but the spirit is not crushed because I know who holds my hand.

Take time to contemplate the meaning of Psalm 119:71 “My suffering was good for me, for it taught me to pay attention to your decrees.” I will never have the answers to many life questions until when I meet Jesus face to face. Meanwhile, get to know God more and more, than I might be able to understand His decrees a little better. I don’t know about you, but I know 1 Corinthians 13:13 “Three things will last forever…” I particularly like the Message translation: “…Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.” Let love be our motivating force to face each new day and to accept the unknown reasons behind the suffering we witness.

Do You Want to Get Well?

by Judi Chow

I have never had the opportunity to step into the cancer ward of a hospital, but I know the ordeals of chemotherapy and radiotherapy. Many missionaries have gone through these kinds of treatment, some recovered and some went “home” to be with the Lord. After several rounds of treatments, a friend decided enough is enough since all the treatments she went through didn’t work, hair lost is minor compared to the puffy-yellowish face with weakening strength and will each day. I don’t have to ask if she wants to get well; of course she does – leaving her husband and two teenagers behind is unbearable! I did ask if she will try other treatments; she told me it won’t make any difference since it is just a waste of time and money resulting in more torture and disappointment. My friend has lost faith in medical treatments; she wants to get well but she has no hope of getting well!

About two thousand years ago by the Pool of Bethesda in Jerusalem, Jesus asked a man the same question: Do you want to get well? (John 5:1-9) Of course he did, day after day, year after year, lying there waiting – listening to the pain, smelling the sick, and watching people rushing into the pool – to get well. That’s why he replied to Jesus – how can I? No one helped me and I can’t help myself. (My interpretation) Maybe you don’t know what is it like to be a helpless invalid for 38 years, but you can imagine or even have experienced hopelessness. I assume this man wanted to get well but he had no hope of getting well!

A pastor who had three major brain surgeries has proclaimed health is not the most important thing in life. Maybe the surgeries affected the brain’s normal function? Don’t we all pray for health and wish for wealth? This pastor lives with a time-bomb in the brain and decreasing sensations in all four limbs and has proclaimed the most important thing in life is: HOPE! I didn’t ask if this pastor wants to get well, but by the continuing treatments, therapy, and exercise the answer is evidently yes. In this case, getting well is not as important as having hope. How true, as a counselor and missionary, I don’t have all the answers or solutions to people’s problems but I am there to instill hope.- hope not necessarily in the things we wanted or the health we seek but in a way out through Christ!

Jesus took away the question, the blame, and the doubt by commanding that man by the pool to get up, pick up his mat, and walk! Instant healing took place, restoration of strength on all four limbs happened before this man knew who did what. Out of so many people who wanted to get well, Jesus chose to heal that man and welcomed my friend “home” to be with Him. Why? Maybe He loves her more; maybe she has fulfilled her destiny. I can rationalize and justifiy but I am not in the position to question God’s decision. It’s a life-long learning of trusting and accepting His will is better than my will and His ways are higher than my ways.

When you feel stuck, no one seems to understand, no one is reachable to help, and no hope of getting well (physically or emotionally), please remember Jesus is only a prayer away. He can pull you out of that state of hopelessness!

Why are You Afraid?

by Judi chow

One of the questions we ask missionary candidates for their Pre-field psychological assessment is, “What do you fear the most?” Let me share some of the answers here: snakes and rats, death and separation, sin against God, not being used by God, my parents die before accepting Christ, my child’s safety, getting seriously ill on the field, not able to accomplish my task as a missionary… the list goes on and on. Looking at these answers from missionaries now serving in different parts of the world, you can see that missionaries are also human beings with blood, sweat, and tears.

Often times, missionaries as well as church leaders tell me in tears they are scared. As a counselor, I can analyze the psychological causes of their fear like: feeling threatened, powerless, perceived danger, inadequacy, rejection, and guilt (genuine and false). Fear usually arises from lack of trust and when one falls into uncontrollable situations or the unknown. As a missionary, I know servants of the Lord are not immune to fear. Even Jesus’ disciples were really scared when their little fishing boat was about to be swallowed by the storm. They tried to wake Jesus up by shouting, “Lord, save us! We are going to drown!” The disciples really thought they were going to die, and Jesus responded with a question, “Why are you afraid? You have so little faith!” (Matthew 8:23-26)

Every one of us has our own fears. I don’t know about you, but my number one fear is… believe it or not… preaching! Do you know why? Well, maybe I have been taught women ought not to preach and if I do, then I am being disobedient. Preaching is proclaiming God’s Word, and what if I don’t get it right, will I be leading people astray? What will people think of me then? Here, finally, I have come to the bottom line – my concern is about my performance, my face, me! I am just like the disciples focusing on the circumstances and my own well-being, having so little faith! I neglected the fact Jesus knows and He cares! Numerous times Jesus assures us, “I am here! Don’t be afraid.” (Matt. 14:27; Mark 6:50) I am getting better at conquering the fear of preaching now. I still sweat over sermon preparation and experience butterflies in the stomach before approaching the pulpit, but during delivery I try to stay tuned into Jesus’ comforting promise, “I am here! Don’t be afraid.

Fear did not go away completely as my faith factor still has room to grow. It is understandable for missionaries to be afraid, particularly when one doesn’t know a wave is a welcomed invitation or a hostile rejection. Facing the unknown and uncontrollable circumstances on the field without a support system can force a person to turn to Jesus or become self-reliant. I am sad to said, as I counsel missionaries in times of need or fear, their first answer usually is not Jesus!

Jesus’ question, “Why are you afraid?” is followed by what seems to me a rebuke, “You have so little faith!” Jesus didn’t stop there; he stood up and rebuked the wind and the waves showing the disciples He can calm the storm at sea as well as the storm in their hearts. Jesus’ presence and power overcame fear!

Next time when you are scared, focus on His promise, “I am here! Don’t be afraid.”

No Regrets?!

by Judi Chow

I have attended many funerals and memorial services recently, some were my friends and others were well-respected servants of the Lord ranging in age from twenty-something to over a hundred. They all left friends and family members behind to mourn for them, from parents to spouses to children to great-grandchildren. I also recall a funeral of a security guard of an apartment building. My friend was asked to officiate the ceremony since she is the only pastor he knew, and it turned out she was the only person there. This is sobering – how we spend our days will reflect upon what kind of impact we have on other people’s lives. This is the legacy we shall leave behind.

For the last several years, I have been talking about retiring although I am not at that age yet. I thought about opening a coffee shop/art gallery somewhere and go someplace to learn how to make a nice cup of Cappuccino. What’s wrong with me? Is it because of the feeling of bearing too much heavy responsibilities? Am I not doing what God has gifted me to do? No, I don’t have an identity problem or role confusion; I am called to serve the Lord in caring for the missionary community. I love training and counseling missionaries and enjoy writing about it also… But why the thought of leaving it all? Am I having a midlife crisis?

The fact is, I know I have reached a point in my life where my days lived are greater than my days left to live. This is a critical transitional period most people my age have to overcome, just like searching for identity during adolescence. Maybe this is triggered by the recent deaths of my peers as well as the appearing wrinkles and aging spots on my face. I cannot stay up all night to work anymore. I can accept my mortality. I know my days on earth are numbered. How should I make the best of what God has endowed me so I may hear “well done, my good and faithful servant” (Matthew 25:21) when I see Jesus face to face? Am I living a life with no regrets no matter if I have 10 years, 10 months, or 10 days to live?

In “The Bucket List” movie, two old guys, who have been given 6-12 months to live due to cancer, made a list of things to do before they die (kick the bucket). I know lots of people have made up their own bucket list and post it on the Internet for the world to see. Let me share with you some of them: Read the whole Bible; Get as many people as I can to know Jesus; Skydive; Get married and have kids; Be a missionary; Travel the world; Write a book… Etc. I assume doing these things will make one feel a sense of accomplishment and enjoyment. I don’t have a bucket list but there are things I’d like to do before I die, like setting up a missions village, seeing the seven wonders of the world, and riding in a real hot-air balloon. If I don’t do these things before I see Jesus, will I regret it?

As a woman going through midlife, what am I searching for behind these questions I ask myself?… Yes, I do want to finish well… by God’s standard! I want to be a good and faithful servant in HIS eyes! What if all of a sudden due to my own physical or mental limitations or the needs of my parents or for whatever reasons I can no longer be a missionary… what do I do then? Will I be really fulfilling God’s destiny for me by operating a coffee shop/art gallery somewhere in the world? Eric Liddell‘s famous line in the movie “Chariots of Fire” came to mind, “God made me fast. And when I run, I feel His pleasure.” He did run, not only in the Paris Olympics, but all the way to China as a missionary.

The bottom line for all of us in midlife to ponder is: Do I know whom God made me to be, and do I feel His pleasure in what I do? Are you in that transitional period when you think you might be heading for a midlife crisis? Do you want to live a life with no regrets no matter what you do and where you are?

Fasting and Self Control

by Judi Chow

A friend went on a fast for three days and three nights.

My flat-mate just went on a twenty-one day liquid fast.

Another friend went on a forty-day lunch fast.

I know a pastor who went on a forty-day water fast.

Jesus went on a forty-day fast.

I tried to fast for one meal… and my hands were shaking, my feet numbing, my head hurting, my mouth watering, and my stomach growling. I just can’t concentrate on the purpose of fasting- to pray! Please note, I said fast, not skip a meal. It is easy for me to skip a meal or two or three. It often happens as I am in the middle of something so engrossing that I forget about eating. On a few occasions, I needed to fast or abstain from food for 12 hours or so to do a medical check up. From my personal experience, intentional fasting for spiritual purposes requires discipline and self-control.

Traditionally, fasting is defined as voluntarily going without food in order to focus on prayer and fellowship with God. Actually, it can be anything that distracts one from getting close to the heart of God, such as internet surfing or as simple as talking to people. I was at a retreat center where they emphasized the practice of silence even during meals. It was a good enforced discipline in denying oneself from talking to people so one can listen to God better. No matter whether it is withholding from eating, drinking, looking, or talking, our sole purpose of fasting should be trying to focus our heart, mind, body, and spirit to be in tune with God.

I don’t hear missionaries talk much about fasting. I am not saying they don’t, it’s just that when one does fast—everything else needs to slow down to take second place, including ministry! Fasting might seem to be a luxury instead of a priority. After all, missionaries need the food to give us physical strength for visitation or to plan evangelistic events! Missionaries are always lacking of time, how can we afford to be still to fast and feel weak! I do believe fasting is a lost art of spiritual discipline that has been stereotyped into being just for the super-spiritual giants. Don’t be fooled by it, for it is in weakness we seek God’s strength! Beware, when we want to fast, the devil always tries to find ways to keep us from getting close to God, before and/ or during the fast. Remember Jesus’ fasting in the desert? Can we try to fast one meal a week and dedicate that time of eating to come before God- to adore Him, praise Him, listen to Him. I think if we do that, Jesus will be pleased, because we are following in His steps.

Am I My Brother’s Keeper?

by Judi Chow

When my mom failed to reach my brother at his home or cell phone, she would call and ask me where my brother was. I usually would tell her he was probably out of town but inside I would say, how should I know… am I my brother’s keeper? Without realizing it, I quoted Cain’s answer when the Lord asked, “Where is your brother?” from Genesis 4:9. I might not be as evil as Cain trying to shed his responsibility after killing Abel, but that carelessness mentality is the same. It is not that I don’t care for my brother’s well being; it is just that we live thousands of miles apart, he is a grown man, and I have my own life, ministry, and other responsibilities. This might sound like excuses, but they are genuine reasons for me not knowing my brother’s whereabouts.

Let’s change the scene – suppose a missions director came to the village where a team of missionaries has been working together for three years. Attending their weekly prayer meeting and enjoying the fellowship meal afterwards, the director suddenly realized Missionary A (the only single missionary among the team) wasn’t there and asked, “Where is Miss. A?” “Oh yes, she hasn’t joined us for a few weeks now, must be busy.” Actually Miss. A had an emotional outburst during the last prayer meeting she did attend complaining the missionary couple and family didn’t understand her. The team members didn’t know how to respond and assumed she wanted more privacy, so they left her alone. It is not that they don’t care; it is just that they felt they are called to share the Gospel among the local people there. The family has young kids to home-school and the couple is busy discipling new believers. Excuses? No, these are genuine situations.

I don’t believe any missionary would answer, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” when being asked what happened that caused their fellow missionary to be so distant or depressed. It is just that most missionaries are very focused on their calling to obey the Great Commission to share the Gospel that they might fail to see the Great Commandment to love one another, which includes their fellow missionary. When God asked Cain, “Where is your brother?” He was giving Cain another chance to repent and respond with his conscience. God wanted Cain to search deep in his heart and soul to find a love for his brother instead of the needless jealousy he felt. God probably doesn’t ask us to keep our eyes on our brothers every single minute of the day, but He does want us to love one another. That love can be seen in our daily interaction with our brothers or coworkers.

God is still asking questions today, I am just wondering what kind of questions will He ask me at the end of the day. What about you, what is He asking you? Can you discern His voice?

Lord, hear my prayer!

by Judi Chow

Dear Lord,

Thank you for calling me to labor no matter on the field across the globe or at the office.
Thank you for Your promise to be with me always to the ends of the world.

Thank you for helping me to give up the familiar comfort and security in exchange for an opportunity to share and show Your love.
Thank you for giving me zealousness in proclaiming the Gospel.
Thank you also…  when I seem to be burning out and waiting for Your healing hand’s touch.

Lord, touch me, heal me, embrace me now.
Lord, please show Your mercy when I am suffering from discouragement and misunderstanding.

Enable me to experience Your love so I can love my “enemy” once again.
Empower me to forgive as You have forgiven me.
Enlighten me to see the situation from both sides.
Nourish me with Your Word and Work.
Remind me it is You Who is in control and not me.

Lord, speak to me; surround me with Your presence.
Lord, help me to use all my senses to communicate to the unreached the same way as with my family members and coworkers, so I may……
……listen patiently with my heart as well as my head,
……verbalize my expectations clearly and lovingly,
……express my respect and acceptance toward the other person,
……speak the truth in love and humility but with boldness,
……not compromise the message, but be flexible on the method of deliverance.

Lord, break me, mold me, refine me now.
Lord, help me to put You in the Center of my focus instead of the problem.

Elevate me to meditate on Your Word rather than men’s words.
Let me be satisfied by Your presence more than the work well done.
Allow me to die to self as I carry my cross to follow You each day.
Protect me from the evil one’s temptation.
Cleanse me from sinful and revengeful desires so I can continue to be Your servant.

Holy Lord, show me how to love myself so I can love others as I love You!

In Christ’s Name I pray,


A Prayer for Missionaries

by Judi Chow

Dear Lord,

Thank you for calling so many unknown missionaries laboring in remote villages as well as urban cities across the globe.
Thank you for Your promise to be always with them to the ends of the world.
Thank you for their willingness to give up the familiar comfort and security in exchange for an opportunity to share and show Your love to the lost.
Thank you for their zealousness in the proclamation of the Gospel.
Thank you also… for wounded soldiers awaiting Your healing hand’s touch.

Lord, touch them, heal them, embrace them now.
Lord, please show Your mercy to those who are suffering from discouragement and misunderstanding.

Enable them to experience Your love so they can love their “enemy” once again.
Empower them to forgive as You have forgiven them.
Enlighten them to see the situation from both sides.
Nourish them with Your Word and Work.
Remind them it is You Who is in control and not them.

Lord, speak to them, surround them with Your presence.
Lord, help them to use all their senses to communicate to the unreached the same way as with their family members and coworkers, so they may……
……Listen patiently with their heart as well as their head,
……Verbalize their expectations clearly and lovingly,
……Express their respect and acceptance of the other person,
……Speak the truth in love and humility but with boldness,
……Not to compromise the message, but be flexible on the method of deliverance.

Lord, break them, mold them, refine them now.
Lord, help them to put You in the Center of their focus instead of the problem.

Elevate them to meditate on Your Word rather than men’s words.
Let them be satisfied by Your presence more than the work well done.
Allow them to die to self as they carry their crosses to follow You each day.
Protect them from the evil one’s temptation.
Cleanse them from sinful and revengeful desires so they can continue to be Your servants.

Holy Lord, show them how to love themselves so they can love others as they love You!

In Christ’s Name,


1st, 2nd, or 3rd?

by Judi Chow

Have you ever felt like you didn’t hear something right? I had this feeling when my friend introduced her husband to me, “This is Second, my husband.” “Huh… Oh, hi, Ss…” Dare not to repeat the name fearing it might be Simon instead of Second. “Yes, it is S-e-c-o-n-d, meaning Jesus is first in my life.” Well now, that is a bold statement, a good testimony, and great conversation material! Ever since then I have put Second at the top of my special name list, until recently I came across an article entitled, “I am Third.” I don’t know anyone personally by the name- Third; it could have topped Second! Actually, the article was about some teenager who went to camp where he was taught the priorities in life should be God first, other people second, and I am third.

It was a revelation to this kid to place himself third while the media is brainwashing us all to look out for number one- oneself. Maybe kids nowadays need to be reminded to put others before themselves, so they can be more self-sacrificing instead of going with the current self-centeredness. After all, this is part of our spiritual heritage; most missionaries and ministers I know are obliged by this golden rule of putting people’s needs before their own or even their family’s. Some have creatively blended God and ministry together and placed that first in their priority resulting in burnout. Yet, in their mind and heart, they have followed the golden rule of putting God first, others second, and themselves third or even last!

What’s wrong with this priority list? Can we go by a list all the time anyway? Do we make decisions by meticulously going over our priority list? For example, one morning as I was leaving for my weekend personal retreat to uninterruptedly focus on God, suddenly the phone rang and someone was crying incoherently talking about her husband’s abuse. She wanted me to help her escape. What was I to do? How do I put this situation into a priority list of first, second, or third? The older I get, life seems to become more complicated. It is not just simply black or white; there are all shades of grays in between, not counting the color spectrum.

May I suggest a very simple priority list by asking yourself, who is really first in your life? Is it others? Is it God? Is it ministry? Is it your own desires or needs? If God is really first, then ask Him who or what He wants to place in second or third or last on your priority list! He’ll tell you; more than that, He’ll show you. You might be surprised; God’s priority list usually is quit different from ours. What I need to keep tabs on is always checking Who is on the top of my list.